Onward to the Oncologist(s)

by Maggan

in Chemo Therapy,Diagnosis,Doctor's Appointment,Prognosis


The Breast Consultants at Vanderbilt University confirm the previous findings in my pathology report. And Dr. Guru assures me that “he would not do a re-excision on his own wife.”  That does it for me. I cancel the appointment  with the second surgeon, the one set by my sister-in-law.

After all, the second surgeon has not been inside my boob. Dr Guru has.  And I find Dr. Guru’s statement that he would “not redo the surgery on his own wife”  more compelling than anything he could have told me. His wife was my anesthesiologist: attractive, funny, smart, a bit sassy. I believe that Dr. Guru has every reason to want her around.

For the first time in weeks, months really, I begin to relax. I don’t have to delay further treatments. I will have radiation for sure, but I can deal with that. No worries.

I still feel tremendously weary and anxious at the mere thought of chemo therapy though.  But Dr. Guru rolls that stone off  my heart with a few words: “Not much benefit for someone like you,”  he says, and shares with me a chart that shows only a one percent benefit of chemo therapy in my case.

-Why did you not say so right away? I ask him. You know I have been petrified.

-Well, I wanted it to be your decision, he says. Some women will opt for chemo even for a one percent benefit.

In a jiffy, life looks simple and uncomplicated.  No speed bumps ahead.  No re-excision. No chemo therapy. Now that I have dodged that scary chemo bullet, I promise myself to be a good person. I will be more patient, kinder, less judgmental. From this day on forward, I will be a new me to show the whole world my gratitude. Always.

I have an appointment, arranged by my sister-in-law, with Dr. Weary a much respected oncologist whose specialty, it seems, is to keep cancer patients alive long after others would have tossed in the towel. The day after, I have an appointment with another oncologist, at the Medical School, arranged by Dr. Guru’s office. I might as well hear two opinions, have two physicians confirm in unison that all is A-OK.

I am on cloud nine.

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